I just wanted a salad, not an adrenalin rush.

So to the three of you who have been following my blog (thanks, btw), this post combines a couple (and by a couple I mean "several", and by "several" I really mean 4) things I've been blogging about lately.

1. Running
2. The Marina
3. Internal Dialogue
4. My Nemesis

I was walking with Bernadette in the Marina (explanation: I've been running along the Marina Green with her a few times a week...[explanation to the explanation: she made me do it at first and now I like it, okay?])...ahem. anyway.

I was walking with Bernadette in the Marina after our run towards this place that serves up pretty delicious salads. We jay walk (rebels), and out of the corner of my eye I see this red pickup truck start backing up and then stop and pull back into the driveway. I think nothing of it at the time.

Soooo we're walking down the sidewalk, with a lot of room to our left because we're respectful..and this DOUCHEBAG walks past me and totally checks me in the shoulder from behind and rudely says "EXCUSE ME".

The next half a second felt like 10 minutes to me, and my mind goes into full analysis self-talk mode:

[begin internal dialogue]

me1: Mother !@(*$* Marina fucking douchebag
me2: Fucking chode
me3: !!!

me1: Tense it up, I'm gonna punch this guy.
me2: Or at least yell at him.

me3: Maybe it's not worth it?
me1 & me2: WHAT?
me3: Maybe..well, we're tired, we just ran. Let's just forget it and get salad.

me1: Oh, she's turning toward him.
me2: Did we just shoot lasers out of our eyes or was that my imagination?
me3: We still have time we do NOT have to make eye contact.

[Makes eye contact]

me1: What the, wait..why can't I talk
me2: Why..wait...what the fuck?
me1 & me2 & me3: WE KNOW HIM!

[end internal dialogue]


And low and behold, it is Matt. My Nemesis. From work.

Apparently, he was already in his car when he had seen me and decided that he wanted to mess with me. Kudos to him. He was actually pretty proud of himself, asking "Did I get you?"

No blood was spilled tonight. It's his turf. And I wanted a salad.



Apparently my nemesis lives in the Marina.

Figures.