It rhymes with "Candice"

The following words are uncommon enough in everyday language that I always think people are saying my name or talking about me:

canvas
canvass
Kansas
campus

Everyday phrase that can sometimes make me look up:

"Can this?"

This has been a public service announcement.

I think I just saw Elvis. How do I copyright that?

I was looking at the US Copyright Office & found this FAQ:

"How do I protect my sighting of Elvis?"

Copyright law does not protect sightings. However, copyright law will protect your photo (or other depiction) of your sighting of Elvis. File your claim to copyright online by means of the electronic Copyright Office (eCO). Pay the fee online and attach a copy of your photo. Or, go to the Copyright Office website, fill in Form CO, print it, and mail it together with your photo and fee. For more information on registration a copyright, see SL-35. No one can lawfully use your photo of your sighting, although someone else may file his own photo of his sighting. Copyright law protects the original photograph, not the subject of the photograph.

Hmm. It's asked enough to be in the FAQ.

To be safe I used a picture from picapp.com. I didn't want to get into copyright problems posting a copyright blog...

Cleaning out my txt msgs again.

I have a new phone that makes it much easier to txt msg. As a result, I've been texting more & receiving more texts than ever before! Below is just 2 months worth (it got full already)

May

Kristin: TANG BANG

Kristin: Well let's tang bang again soon! I liked that bar.

Mom: Drunk!

Tobi: Gay

Brittany: No it starts at hooters in the city.

Scott: lucky dude! :-)

Sister: YES LETS DO THIS THANG!

Sister: Boo! She hates you that much huh? Don't we all!
Sister: Yes, it's hard 2 keep up the facade of friendship while fonduing. She knew her limits.
Sister:
"but it's so...palpable!"
"and so is my hatred for you"
"..but?.."
"NO! EVERYTHING TASTES BITTER RIGHT NOW!"

Brittany: drunk...
Brittany: Qellmy drunkenness lasted about ten minutes...

Jon: Met Ryan, Mel, Tim, and Andy tonight for dinner & the Long Beach College Bowl came up. I know I said 'will you stop spitting on me'. Was there a rain forest reference as well?

Scott: I love hate sf.

Brittany: So u drunk yet?

Scott: =( from now on i will never miss an episode of idol ever.

Scott: Pft, id rather lose than listen. :)

Oliver: napa again? fiend.

me: I'm high class drunk right now
Oliver: tranquila.
Rhett: I've always said that about you.

Stan: Done? U retiring early? So unlike u.

in response to my txt about going to canada:
Brittany: I'm not going anywhere with you! U mass text messager!!! Damn you.
Rhett: Wow I feel so special that u would invite me
Oliver: I've never been to like, normal Canada

Rhett: Well now you know where you went wrong

Rhett: Bitch.

Greg: Sounds like you got tryna get the hell outta dodge fever funny must be going around because I damn sure got it. :)

Oliver: f no

Scott: (rolls eyes) ;-)

Mike: Yep. After I eat this hotdog.

Keane: $3 martini and booth. Surprisingly awesome. Surprisingly.

Oliver: <3

David: yeah me too. I will feel much better when the lakers lose.

Scott: I did. i cried all night.

June

Sister: Yes. If it doesn't scare the crap out of her. R u home yet?

Sister: YOU HEARD ME

Scott: Ten bucks or i fwd to sfpd.

anonymous in response to "do you wanna go to the bar tonight": Planning on casual sex instead.

John S: Hold up, u don't talk to me for how long and you out of the blue ask me for another man's number? Wassup with that, and the number I have is so old i don't think it works.
John S: Sorry, I forgot to add the number cuz I am mad (number)

Greg: Vancouver strip clubs here we come!
Greg: Get me info Let's do this!

Tinna: Thank u for helping me surprise Ryan!!! He was truly terrified :)

Rock, Paper, Bagels?

Just random musings with my older sis.

sister: hmmm
me: HMMMMM
sister: that *is* a quandry
me: QUANDRAY
me: QUANTUM LEAP RAY
sister: quantas sleep fries
me: chili cheese fries.
sister: simi valley lies
me: Sim City Family Ties
sister: siamese cat heights
me: bagels.
me: I win.
sister: hardly
me: DAMMIT
sister: bagels with lox and cream cheese
sister: I WIN
me: ....well played.
sister: exactly
sister: you made the common bagel rookie mistake

chp

If I were to ever write a missed connection, it would have been for today

Dear CHP Guy-

I'm usually a sucker for a guy in uniform, but you caught my friend & I by surprise. I had no idea CHP uniforms were as crazy attractive as Marine Digicams. You're the first one I've ever met. Until then, I only thought you guys looked like Erik Estrada.

We realized you were pulling us over, we had no choice. And as we were swearing up a storm, you surprised me by coming over to my side. Thanks, btw, for motioning for me to roll the window down. I honestly wasn't expecting a CHP officer to be at my window, nor was I expecting him to be young and freaking hot.

You said something about registration blah blah blah but I was lost in your deep, blue eyes. Sure, the paperwork is valid..take her license, but please, take my heart.

Somewhere in between the shuffle and frustration of the day, you found it in your heart to let us off without too bad of a punishment, and with enough time for my friend to make her appointment.

You have her address. Just show up, we'll figure out the future from there.

- The girl who couldn't say anything.

random knowledge drop: Piggy Banks

I tend to look up random things when I'm either talking about it or get really curious about it.

I was curious about the origin of piggy banks.

Thank you wikipedia!

Interesting note, I did NOT realize that they weren't originally shaped like pigs. The term came from the clay that it was using, "pygg". It's like my eyes have been opened.

This probably would be something *I* would have started.

You ever feel so upset/angry/bored that all you wanted to do was take it out violently on something?

Are videogames not real enough, and are you already out of Ikea plates to smash?

You can pay to go and smash the shit out of things now. Here.

I really want to go to San Diego now. How badass would a smash trip on the way to Tijuana be?!

edit: apparently they offer discounts "We offer police, fire, military, student and senior discounts. Just remember to ask!*"

..I just imagined police officers shooting the shit out of plates.

Pride Day #1!

Today was such a fabulous day i have to blog about it before i forget everything that we did.

So tobi came over last night and is currently crashing on my couch for Pride Weekend!

ZOMG we did a lot today.

Here is a quick breakdown:

THE DAY BEGINS
1st, Candice had one of those realistic nightmares, meaning I didn't wake up until 10am. Woke up, showered, and prepared to go to Civic Center for the Pride festivities.

Arrived at O'Farrell and Van Ness. Distracted by Books, Inc.

(dude i really want some cap'n crunch right now)

PRIDE AT CIVIC CENTER
Then we went to Pride festivities near the Civic Center. Since it had JUST opened up there was barely anyone there, and tobi and i kept getting the schwag that people ended up waiting for in line later on (whoo hoo!)
Free stuff obtained:

-Me not Meth tshirt
-Dante's Cove sampler DVD
-Necklace
-2 tickets to the alameda county fair (anyone either want these tix or want to go)
-AT&T Tshirt that says "Call from the Pride Parade, sound like you're in the closet" (haha)
-Full deck of Playing Cards (apparently Reno has a pride day too)
-Obama Pride Sticker
-Got Sperm? Sticker
-Library card (details below)

Tobi made out with that PLUS he got a couple of bags.

I also bought 3 5733 tshirts for $30. Bargain bin.
After noticing that their booth was in front of the public library, I decided to go get a library card.
Yes you heard right I GOT A LIBRARY CARD. FUCK YEAH. It's a fancy decorative one PLUS i have one for my keychain. I rule.

Since I hadn't eaten breakfast, we found this place on yelp and ended up running into it accidentally. I forgot what it's called but it's this AMAZING vegetarian restaurant on the corner of grove and market.

Then i bought a sticker that has a zelda nintendo cartridge on it and it says BLOW ME. serious. yes, I'll show it to you sometime.

Tobi found out that one of his favorite DJs was playing at Temple, so he offered to buy me a ticket so that we could BOTH go and party all night long.

I also bought some black and red fairy wings in anticipation of TOMORROW's festivities, which should be even crazier.
Thinking I was going to go home right after this, I didn't think too hard about this purchase.

I ended up carrying it for the next few HOURS.

RANDOM MOVIE TIME
So Tobi and I were walking up Van Ness back to Geary for the mighty 38. I see the ad for Wall-E and make a comment about how we should go see it.

Tobi agrees, then I realize it's gonna be hella full since it's opening weekend. We go in to see what else is playing, and I realize that KUNG FU PANDA is playing in like 4 minutes.

Tobi buys my ticket (tobi was buying stuff for me all day awww)
And we see Kung Fu Panda!! It ruled, but we were definitely in the "hey let's bring our rude and noisy kids who talk about the movie real loud and you cant tell them to shut up because the other parents will shun you pride-sticker-wearing motherfuckers"

FYI they're making High School Musical 3 for the big screen. About time they figure out they can milk that cow for even more lucious milk.

WALK TO THE CRAWL
So after the movie's over, we go "great break, let's head home".
I notice it's almost 5, and since my OTHER birthday celebrating friend was having a bar crawl that started at that time on Polk Street, I call him up to see if he's already there. he is.
After some clever iPhoning, we realize the bar he's at is 1.1 miles away.

Wings in hand, we hoof it.

However, there are tons of distractions along Polk. I'm talking walgreens, secondhand shops, and oh yes, the distraction of them all Good Vibrations.

Realizing this could just be the most brilliant birthday gift to my friend ever, Tobi and I run on in.

I must say, the customer service in this sex shop is well above what is expected. i had been in here once before, but man this time around they were really friendly.
"What kind of gift would you like to get him?"
"Does he like bondage?"
"You can hook up your iPod to it" (yes people this is real. It's like the vibrator for geek girls)

After playing certain HR Violation scenarios that might have arisen from giving my coworker/friend this gift, I decide that I should just buy him a beer when we get to the bar.

1.1 miles and about an hour of distraction of Polk Street later, we arrive at the

PUB CRAWL

I arrive, and am the only worker there so far. I'm half an hour late to the start.

I meet all his friends, and I high five every single one of them with my patented solid high fives. They're virtual bowling, and apparently my high fives cause strikes.

Buy Brendan a beer. Talk about good vibrations with the only other girl there to the absolute entertainment of the other boys around.

Kelsey arrives with her Feed Bag from Whole Foods so of COURSE since I'm in love with it Tobi is also in love with it 'cause we both rule like that.

So we find out the nearest Whole Foods is also conveniently on the 1 line back home anyway. So I close out my tab and we after grabbing a muni to take us the blocks we just walked, we eventually find ourselves in

WHOLE FOODS
So we figure out quickly that we suddenly don't want dinner from here and would rather just go to a restaurant, so we beeline it for the Feed bags. I debate buying one for my little sister and sending it back to Hawai'i (no whole foods there), bud decide against it for at least this two week time period.

After debating what to eat, we eventually settle on

Q
Definitely one of my favorite restaurants, and so happy that it's in my neighborhood. Usually I come here for just brunch...but ended up here for dinner tonight.

Here Tobi and I make the plan for the rest of the night (yeah, the sun is STILL at this time people).
We're gonna go to my place, rest for a bit, get dolled up and then go back to Temple where 92.7's Queen is taking place.

Food is delish.
Get back home. Go to buy tix online for queen..and of course It's SOLD OUT.

Of course! Everything that day had been going amazingly, why not throw a wrench? After a couple of minutes of debate..we decide to do the unthinkable.
To go to the one place that everyone IS going. The place where it's stupid to go on pride night.

BUT because this is Tobi's Birthday Weekend, and he's Gay, AND it happens to also be Pride Weekend...

We go to the

CASTRO STREET PARTY: PINK SATURDAY
I will admit. I didn't think it was going to be that massive. I thought there'd be a lot of people in the bars there, like Haight at Halloween time.

I didn't realize that they'd close off the street and that there'd be a SEA of people already waiting for us to party with them when we got there.

Shared a cab with Josh. Got dropped off at the top top...and oh. my. god.


IT WAS AWESOME. SHEER AWESOME. So many people! So many colors!

And every hot guy there was gay so no pressure!
Although within 5 minutes of me navigating through the crowd I had a guy come up to me and just fondle my breast. I'm not talking accidental "Whoops i just touched your boob" but straight up squeezing to see if I'm real. The last time I went to the Castro,something similarly "wow" happened, but that was mostly verbal. I look back at the guy and start laughing, assuming he's gay, and i go back and start doing the same thing to his chest. He looks like he's enjoying it, so I suddenly get suspicious, and then his gay friend leans in and goes "um, he's hetero..haha"

Good times.

Tobi and I brave it all the way to the front and center of the DJ stage, and it is PACKED. It's like metallica concert moshpit packed. And unfortunately not everyone there is respecting one another, it's definitely not like a hawaii concert.

But it is hella fun. We end up dancing from the minute we get there to the time the party is shut down at midnight due to lameness.

We run for our bus that happens to be there, but end up walking to Dolores Park
I hail a cab (thank GOD that was hard) and we head home.

FINALLY BACK TO THE APARTMENT
where i sit blogging about this.

Tomorrow morning's going to be even crazier with the pride parade and everything. I look forward to wearing my goth outfits again, haven't put them on in seriousness in years.
=)

Goodnight blogland! Today was one of the most eventful days of my life. If i had planned this stuff, I probably wouldn't have gotten them done. I love random days. Today I kinda wanted to be a lesbian just so I could be *extra* proud.
C'est le vie, just gotta be straight I guess.

The HUGE txt msg log.

I am currently at 816 txt msgs in my inbox. As one would guess, my phone is working REALLY slowly right now.

There's some funny shit in there, so I didn't want to erase it 'til i blogged it in some shape or form.

So here it is. Some of it's out of context...and that's the way I like 'em.


Oldest first:
October '07
Kate K:
pic msg of Boba Fett, "I want, $325 :("

Rhett:
Yes. Foxtail v kite. Fight of the century.

My sister:
My prof talks like the priest from princess bride. With a chinese accent. For some reason I want to kill him.

Rhett:
I knew the Goth chick in u would freak

Rhett:
This is the drunkest text I've ever read.

John: (from my living room couch)
Want to say goodbye but I don't know which room is yours LOL!

Eric: pic msg of an entombed rattlesnake
What does your boss bring in from home?

Older Sister: pic msg of my niece falling asleep for the first time on her own
unbelievable.

Little Sister:
You're a WTF. White Typical Filipino. Ha ha ha.

Kate:
Marry, fuck or kill: Aunt Jemima, the Pillsbury Doughboy, or the Oscar Meyer Weiner Guy...


December '07

Eric: no txt, just a picture of him celebrating the UH win when I was in Hawai'i and he was in San Jose.

Mom: (actually it was my little sister txting from her phone, my mom doesn't know what txts are)
Hi, you're my favorite daughter.

My little sister:
OMG you SO write slash type like how we talked crap about.

Rhett:
Where r u, Bitch!

Rhett:
-Ok. Good job. Stollbpn for a movie tmr?
-(next morning) Wow. I was fucked up. Totally don't remember this txt conversatoin. 4:00 Juno?

Josh:
Felic Navidad!


Rhett:
-No thanks. I'm on day 2 of a hangover anyway.
me:
-me too.
Rhett:
-I have not felt like this since 21st bday. No Idea what happened.
me:
-I'm having the worst hangover of my life. If you told me killing a kitten right now would help I would do it.
Rhett:
-Candice, killing the RIGHT kitten will help.
me:
-Shit. It must have been the wrong kitten.

January '08

During the Sugar Bowl:
Christian:
Colt Brennan Sucks!
My little sister:
-That's okay. Hopefully someone gets punched. I hope the GA team gets gonorrhea from their cheerleaders.
-Oh and joel says the GA QB is one chromosome away from down syndrome.
---

Keane:
Simpsons movie worse the 2nd time.


Rhett:
-That's not english!
-I have no idea what u r talking about, but I can tell you have been drinking

Chris K:
I'm a douchebag!

Febuary '08

My little sister: picture of the huge back tattoo she just got..
"Don't kill me."

Rhett:
Me wantee drinkee.

Eric:
fuckin wondercon craziness woohoo

Eric:
Time to shoot your engineers! Site is down again!!

Kate:
I just scored a bubble umbrella! Take that rain!

Rhett:
U r so coming in costume tomorrow.

Lil Sis:
So me and mom are at cpk and we ordered a salad and a pizza. And the waitress was like did you want the salad to come out first or did you want them to come out at the same time? And mom just did her stare and said it comes with a salad?!
I was like MOM! We ORDERED a salad!

Jeremy(roomie)
"Hey Dirty! Baby I got ya money Dont u worry!" -O.D.B.

Jeremy:
Just thought you'd like to know the new roomie cleaned out the microwave.

March '08

Brendan:
Word. H4x0rz up n00bs down.

Lil Sis: pic msg of her burger king kids club card from like 10 years ago.

Paul C:
This is the best creme egg in the history of the universe. You've made up for the Bon Jovi mistake earlier.

Lil sis:
And at your white trash party dont forget to chew gum with your mouth open.

and i just broke it scrollin through

Oliver:
Holy shit. my only advice is don't kill anybody.

lil sis:
Mom seriously jacked two holy waters when the priest said take one. Seriously, it's not the holy grail.

Oliver:
Yarr i do but i have movie plans with a friend who's in town. plus apparently your text was an hour and a half ago.

Tobi:
Yup I love it tobi in the city of hot bois well there better be. I want clam chowder.

Kelsey:
Love you drunky.
Get up and get in bed mother fucker (apparently I was on the ground)

April '08

Rhett:
So Brittany just saw her first metal show.

Kelsey:
you rule.

Kat:
I just heard this gay guy say "girl you do NOT let your faghag get that drunk. That's gay boyfriend 101!" and then we walked past nizario's pizza and saw a girl fall off her seat. Her gay bf caught her though.

Kat:
Nah i'm trying to quit, it's cutting into my cocaine money

Lil sis
Im gonna kill ticketmaster

Brendan: picmsg of Papyrus
OMG ITS IN MY HOUSE

Oliver:
Watch out for stray quickenings.

Brendan: picmsg of papyrus
Its in my parents house!!!

lil sis studying in the law library:
OMG it's weird in here. Like all the desks are taken. There are books and picture frames on the desks but no one sitting there. Almost like the seats are assigned or everyone marked their territory or something
Of like their babies or significant others. It was weird. Like how you walk intoa n office full of grad student desks. Messy too.
I left! There was NO where to sit. And it was weird. Like different place weird.

Bob:
Tell Rhett I always kinda wanted to do him too. Sorry Tom.


May '08

older sis:
Buy chinese dress? Cross fingers not racist? haha. Was going 2 ask u 2 buy anyway regardless. Firm believer crossing fingers acceptable method 2 clear soul.

Oliver:
What's the flower for being a bad ass motherfucker?

Oliver:
Y'ALL CAN'T WALK NO LINE

Brendan: Picmsg of Papyrus bumper sticker saying "Create the World You Want To see"
How about a world without papyrus?

Keane:
Thanks for coming last night! It really means a lot. I woke up picking bills off the floor and trying to remember what happened. Like Memento without the Tattoos.

Rhett:
Your a bad person
Oliver:
honestly I'm too drunk to provide legal advice. I say go for it.

Maddy:
Lol. isn't it a lil early to be drinking?

Jeremy:
I'm making spam loco moco for dindin. Jealous?


Berna:
Are we going to be dino twins? You wear brontosaurus?

Dan:
Take off my socks. Ooh baby baby

June '08

Brendan:
Guh. I went to whole foods and there was so much papyrus . I almost fainted.


Okay done.
That took an HOUR and a HALF. jesus. Erasing phone now. Feels good.

EDIT:
Rhett wanted to put his side of the story. And since he has an iPhone, here's his side. I leave it up to you to put the pieces in the right place. It's part of the fun

rhettg said...

Those texts are decidedly one sided.... where is the OUTBOX Candice!!!

Candice: Devo! Whip it! i font know how but I got in

Candice: Drunk

Candice: DRUNK AS FUCK

Candice: Buzzd

Candice: Totally drunk at YOUR APARTMENT

Candice: Is it illegal to play with a baby while intoxicated

back in sf

I love hawai'i. I miss hawai'i. I miss my family.

But I went to a bar in the Castro tonight after I came in at 9pm..

and you gotta love a city where the night of my return this dude in a gay bar comes up to me and offers me $200 to sleep with his friend.

wow. just wow.

*sigh* you caught me looking at LOLCATS

but srsly, I could not stop laughing at this one


see more crazy cat pics

random thought

those weird shaped bandages are always leftover in the box until you actually NEED that weird shape.

And you only figure out what the hell that shape is for when you need it...

st patty's day eve

This is what I love about the city. There's always something going on.

Jess & I went to get some cheap mexican food for dinner.

-Small little interjection here. I love mexican food. I've never really had this great type of
fast mexican food before. A burrito in SF is really just a shitload of ingredients in a fajita.
They SURE shove it in there. Shove it.

I digress. So he shows me the hyatt. Absofukinlutely beautiful.
I spend a lot of time just taking pics of that.


And then we're walking back to BART, when I hear this band. I tried to ignore it at first, but the sound of it meant it was outside...i kept trying to triangulate wtf it was coming from.

We finally give into curiosity, and walk towards it.

St. Paddy's St Party.

Jess high fives me, this harkins back to the days of walking around and having random stuff happen, which is even harder in hawaii.

There was an awesome band, lots of drunk white people.

I checkd out the stand of cool green things to buy. There was a rubber duckie.

I couldn't say no.

Say hello to "Lil' Paddy" everyone!

And here's where blogger truly begins.

Thanks for sitting through that. I give you an internet cookie. HA! see that? full of bad geek puns.


So this blog is gonna be a mix of randomness. Hence the name.

it's my first full year as a californian. I'm freaking out about things you probably think is normal everyday.

I still find myself getting giddy with seeing my own breath.

More to come. Stay tuned.